Assault with a Deadly Moped?

Highlights from the Orange County Sheriff’s Department blotter:

One man's garbage... 5:42 a.m. Tuesday. 0 block Enterprise. A caller reported a man digging through the trash.

Shake, rattle and roll. 4:19 a.m. Tuesday. 0 block of Willowood. A citizen reported a man screaming and writhing on the ground.

House arrest? 7:45 p.m. Monday. 0 block of Endless Vista. A resident said someone locked her home's double front doors together with a bike lock.

Missing keys. 3:15 p.m. Monday. 0 block Vista Del Valle. A caller said a female came over, took the keys to his silver Mercedes and left.

Shoeless Joe. 10:03 p.m. Sunday. 22500 block Chase. A resident said a 30something man who appeared to be under the influence of drugs was on the porch looking at shoes, claiming someone stole his and he was out looking for more.

But what did they use as a net? 9:06 p.m. Sunday. Aliso Creek Road and Enterprise. A caller asked deputies to check for people playing tennis in the parking lot.

Weekend hazing alert. 7:53 p.m. Saturday. Aliso Creek Road and Glenwood Drive. A caller said five males dressed in black were chasing someone and encouraging the person to commit lewd acts, adding that it looked like an attempt at hazing.

Rooftop skateboarders. 4:21 p.m. Saturday. 23400 block Knollwood. A teacher at Wood Canyon Elementary reported hearing kids skateboarding on the school roof.

Assault with a deadly Moped. 3:52 p.m. Friday. 0 block Westerly. The father of a 12-year-old boy said his neighbor intentionally swerved her Moped at his son as he walked along the sidewalk, causing the boy to jump out of the way as she took off down the street.

Teen swordsmen. 3:10 p.m. Friday. Foxborough and Deerhurst. A caller said two teenage boys were waving swords next to a yellow Jeep.